The Saydist

(A pretty girl is walking down a road when a man springs out from a hedge and points a gun at her.) Girl: Oh my God! Please don't hurt me! Saydist: If you don't want to get hurt, you're going to have to do something for me. Girl: (Whimpering) No. Not that. Please. Saydist: Yes! I want you to say 'I love you'. Girl: No! I'm still a virgin! Saydist: (Waving gun) Do it! Girl: All right. (Feebly) I… I l-love you. Now please let me go! Saydist: Oh no. We're not finished yet. Now I want you to say that I have beautiful eyes. Girl: I can't! They look like black holes! Saydist: You want a black hole in your head? Girl: No. Don't shoot. (Against her will) You have nice eyes. Saydist: Beautiful eyes! Girl: Beautiful eyes. Saydist: All as one sentence! Girl: You have beautiful eyes. Saydist: Now say both sentences together! Girl: Please let me go! I'll suck your cock. Saydist: Never mind that! Do as I say! (Hero passing by spots the assault and disarms the attacker. He points the gun at him.) Hero: Are you all right? Girl: I think so. Hero: Now, tough guy, say you're sorry. Saydist: No. Please. Don't make me say that...
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© 2007, 2012. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.